What ALL the Actors of Movie 43 Did Instead of Going to Their Premier for Movie 43

Posted by Georgie on February 5, 2013

We have a real movie mystery on our hands here, guys!  So here’s the scoop:  Last night was the premier for this movie, Movie 43.  Every single Hollywood actor and their 3rd cousin is in it.  I mean this movie has more names in it than a 12 layer nacho dip.

Just take a look at the trailer and you’ll see that this movie is basically a montage of “It” actors in sketches…

SO MANY CELEBRITIES!  So many ones you know, and so many where you’re like, “Oh yeah, that guy! He’s in everything! I know his face but not his name.  Aren’t they married?”  So you’d think this premier would be the biggest thing.

Apparently, it wasn’t. *DUN DUN DUN*

How do we know this?  Because out of all of those famous actors, the most famous one to show up to the premier… was Stifler (aka: Seann Williams Scott).

And he was just as surprised, disappointed, and confused as we are about it (mostly about Halle Berry not showing up).  Here’s his reaction:

Poor Sean William Scott :(  He seems like a really cool, humble guy, who clearly just showed up to his own premier for a chance  to see Halle Berry (like any of us normal red-blooded sentient beings would!)  But the questions remain:

Where was Halle Berry?  Where was Emma Stone?  Where was Christopher Mintz-Plasse?!! WHERE WAS THAT ONE FUNNY BRITISH GUY FROM EXTRAS??

What was soooo important that made these talented, rich, successful, attractive, busy, funny, A-list celebrities miss their own premier?  And for a movie that…

a) None of us have heard of, despite it coming out this weekend, and

b) Is a bunch of completely separate, non-linear sketches, edited together to make one big “movie.”  All of which are ruined by a trailer that most likely gives away all of the funniest parts of the entire film.


Don’t. Panic.  We’ve done some research, and we’ve found out who was doing what, where when and why, when they should have been at this premier *coughlookingatyouHalleBerrycough*  Here it is:

Emma Stone was awkwardly holding this anonymous child.

Christopher Mintz-Plasse was doing karaoke with good pals, The Slip Knots.

Kate Bosworth was pretending to eat a really big slice of pizza, but not fooling anyone.

Johnny Knoxville was stuck on the phone with his mother-in-law for 3 hours.

Kate Winslet was being drawn like one of your french girls.  Again.

And again…

And again…

Naomi Watts was getting a pedicure with her son who definitely does not need to get a pedicure.

Harrison Ford was actually on his way to attend, but then he spilled something on his shirt.

Hugh Jackman was in my dreams.  My bad.

Anna Farris and Chris Pratt were looking for Anna’s phone in her purse, but think she might have left it at Rite Aid.

That Funny British Guy From Extras (Stephen Merchant) was giving a motivational speech to “at-risk” youths.

And of course…

HALLE BERRY was doing something spiteful with this turkey baster.


Are you going to see Movie 43?  Let us know in the comments below!

Follow the editor, @GeorgieGuinane on twitter, and let her know what Dennis Quaid was doing instead of attending!

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