Top 10 Corniest Romantic Movie Lines

Posted by Jillian Madison on May 22, 2010

1. Hope Floats – Harry Connick Jr

“Dancing is just a conversation between two people. Talk to me.”
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Very well, Harry. I’m sticking up my middle finger and doing the electric slide on your favorite vintage t-shirt. If you need help translating, that’s just my way of saying “you’re a corny bitch.”

2. As Good As It Gets – Greg Kinnear

“You’re why cavemen chiseled on walls.”
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Please. Upon hearing that line, the caveman would have traded in his chisel for a NOOSE.

3. Notting Hill – Julia Roberts

“I’m… just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.”
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Look, honey. Leave the losery line at home next to your favorite pillow with the angel embroidered on it – and try standing in front of the boy with a pizza and a 6 pack of beer instead. Good luck with that.

4. Keeping The Faith – Ben Stiller

“God was showing off when he made you.”
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Who wrote this line? JC Chasez of NSYNC? God clearly wasn’t showing off here. He was showing off when he created Sanjaya’s hair.

5. A Good Year – Russell Crowe

“Pardon my lips. They find joy in the most unusual places.”
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Where’s that? On your blow-up doll’s left breast, you huge tool?

6. Love Story – Ali MacGraw

“Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”
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This is bullshit. Love means ALWAYS having to say you’re sorry. It also means enduring holiday parties with people you can’t stand, and pretending to enjoy giving back rubs.

7. Ghost – Demi Moore/Patrick Swayze

“I love you.” “Ditto.”
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DITTO? What the fuck is that? It’s not a reply, it’s a piece of punctuation. If I ever told someone I loved them, and they replied with DITTO, the relationship would be over faster than Madonna could deny she went through menopause.

8. Star Wars: Episode III – Natalie Portman

“Hold me like you did by the lake on Naboo.”
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Too bad he didn’t DROWN HER on the lake at Naboo to spare us all from one of the worst movie lines of all time.

9. The English Patient – Ralph Fiennes

“Swoon. I’ll catch you.”
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I wouldn’t trust his puny biceps to catch anything, let alone Juliette Binoche’s 85-pound body, that’s for sure.

10. Jerry McGuire – Tom Cruise

“YOU… COMPLETE… ME.”
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This might just be the single worst movie line of all time. It’s corny to the power of infinity. And by the way, in the real world, this line is only uttered by drunk fraternity boys hoping to get lucky, and Hannibal Lecter right before he kills you and fashions a facial mask out of your skin.

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