20 Products Shaped Like Boobs

Posted by Jillian Madison on October 18, 2010

No doubt about it: people love boobs, and boob novelty gifts are everywhere these days. But there are certain lines that should never be crossed, people. Here are 20 WTF products that probably should never be boob-shaped:

A soap dispenser


At the end of the day, nothing says sexy like discharge from a breast.
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Boob slippers

You’ll look like a creepy old pervert, but your feet will be warm.
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Boob television remote

A boob remote for the boob tube. Naturally.
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Boob mousebad

Whatever. I don’t believe you bought this to prevent wrist fatigue.
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A boob mouse

Ladies, if your breasts look like that, seek medical help at once.
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Can’t sleep? How ’bout a boob eye mask to block out the light?

Be warned, though: you will probably be mocked, punched, and/or beaten to death while you sleep.
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Stressed out? Try a vibrating boob massager.

Yeah. I’m so sure people will be using it on their “hands.”
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Illuminate the night with boob lights.

Looks more like an ass with boils on it, but hey. You can’t have everything.
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Boob salt and pepper shakers

Perfect for Thanksgiving and other family meals!
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Golf club head covers

Sure to be a HUGE hit at your conservative country club.
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Beer can covers

Show off your lingering mommy issues while getting drunk with your buddies.
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Boob beanbag chair

That “nipple” is the stuff nightmares are made of.
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A boob bong

Just remember to hide it when your grandmother comes over, k?
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Boob milk dispensers

Mmm. Start your morning off right with breast milk in your coffee.
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Boob radio

Remember “tune in Tokyo?” Yeah. Now you can.
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Boob hot water bottles

One word: WHY?
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Pasta boobs

Giada de Laurentiis, eat your heart out.
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Boob scarf

Adored by Asian women everywhere.
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Boob bank

Can’t get your married boyfriend to pay for your boob job? Save up for your new breasts with this boob bank.
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Boob rocket

It’s a stress thing. You’re supposed to squeeze it. Humans are retarded. I rest my case.
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